I wanted to share with you my personal battle with anxiety and confidence, something I know that affects many of us and how I have tackled it head on and how you can too.
Throughout my adolescence I struggled with self-belief. A lack of confidence is responsible for many of us never reaching our full potential – instead of challenging ourselves and moving forward with what we want in life, we allow these fears, worries and doubts to lead us to live a life in the shadows of others, a life of untapped potential and a life fuelled by anxiety. I know from personal experience that it doesn’t have to be like this and with the right tools, we can all overcome our anxieties and achieve our full potential.
Self-belief and having confidence in our own capabilities is one of the most essential traits we need to reach our potential, in all aspects of our lives and work. We all have to deal with challenging situations, people and decisions which impact our business, colleagues, friends and families.
Our beliefs control how we think, how we feel and how we behave – they are an automatic filter through which we experience our very own subjective reality, but our beliefs are not facts, they are simply a mental construct that reside in our unconscious mind, born out of our own formative conditioning and emotional experiences. Beliefs are subjective and facts are objective – beliefs are beliefs and facts are facts!
So if our beliefs are self-limiting, it’s like we are walking through life wearing the wrong prescription glasses – things don’t look the same to us as they do for others, but even so, we seldom challenge our beliefs head on – indeed we are actually inclined to seek out proof to confirm that they are true.
To change our self-limiting beliefs, the key is to constantly challenge them by seeking out evidence to prove or disprove. One way that has worked really well for me is to take on challenges, no matter how daunting! These really help us to slowly realise just what we ARE capable of achieving.
Before I started my business, a lack of self-belief was the only thing holding me back. I questioned why would people take me, a 21 year old female, seriously in the male dominated fitness industry? Why would they listen to my advice over an older male professional? I was utterly consumed by other people’s perception of me as a young female, and was at risk of letting my dreams pass me by. I knew I had what it takes, but I thought it would be easier to accept other people’s idea of who I am rather than accept me for who I know I am.
As it turned out, happily, people will and do listen to my advice because I offer many different qualities which people had been looking for a long time, I am relatable and real (and get results!).
By working on my self-confidence and self-belief back then, I overcame my fears, built my confidence and finally pursued my dreams of creating a successful health and fitness business. It hasn’t been easy but it wouldn’t be called a challenge if it was easy! I am proud to say I conquered those fears and took on all of those scary challenges.
Now, every day I tell myself that ‘I will stop being affected by pre-conceived conceptions and continue to be proud of who I am’, this really helps me to ignore the negative and focus on the positive.
I have learnt that the only way to be successful is to be 100% myself, not everyone will like me but that’s OK, but lots of people do. You cannot please everyone all the time. Trying to be something you’re not in any aspect of life will just result in you being miserable!
I am also learning to trust to my own opinion over anyone else’s and to be proud of my achievements. I know I am capable of breaking through that wall of fear and come out on the other side. I’ve done it many times now and I know having that self-belief will fuel further success.
Overcoming those fears and anxieties is extremely daunting, but this is why I have written this blog. I can honestly say, if you take small steps each day for yourself, the benefits will be truly worth it. If writing and sharing this helps one reader to gain the courage to face their fears head on, improve their self-belief & opens the door for further opportunities and growth, then I have achieved my goal!
A famous quote to end, Henry Ford famously wrote: “Whether we think we can or whether we think we can’t, we are usually right!”