The Pros And Cons Of Having A Baby At The Same Time As Your Friend

Little Mix is about to get even littler, as bandmates Leigh-Anne Pinnock and Perrie Edwards have announced they’re both pregnant

The group’s manager, Sam Cox, who is also pregnant, posted a picture of herself and the two singers cradling their bumps – and it got us thinking about what it’s like to have a baby at the same time as your closest pal. Or, multiple pals, if “pregnancy contagion” has well and truly taken over your group. 

Sure, you have someone to sense-check with throughout pregnancy, but things could get a little tricky if you have different experiences, or if your little cherubs don’t automatically become BFFs, too. 

To find out the other pros and cons – and give the stars an idea of what to expect – we asked women to share their experiences.  

The pros…

A friend at baby group

“My best friend and I had babies 12 weeks apart and we loved it,” says Sarah Nichols, from Wiltshire. “Having someone I knew to go to baby groups with was invaluable, as I’m an anxious person. I don’t think I would have gone otherwise.”

Having someone to hang out with

“Myself and my neighbour had a baby four days apart in May 2020,” says Alexia Sparrow, 27, from east London. “We both work in a school and are the same age. It’s amazing. We’re on the same page with everything! We share dinners, tips and tricks. We walk with the babies and go to the park most days. It’s been a blessing to have somebody in the same boat so close by during lockdowns.”

Sharing the anxiety 

“The best bit is sharing the anxiety,” says Katie Smith*, 35, from Newcastle. “My best friend and I had babies three weeks apart and although we live in different cities, it was so wonderful to have someone close to share the experience with. We each had it hard in different ways and we were non-judgemental with each other, which was lovely.” 

Your kids (hopefully) become friends

“One of my besties and I had babies at the same time. Our eldest kids are in the same class at school and youngest go to nursery together,” says Kirsty Ketley, 40, from Surrey. “They are like extended family and we love it.” 

The cons… 

The babies being compared

“I gave birth the same day as someone in my family and the hardest part is the babies are constantly compared,” says Laura Crayton*, from Liverpool. “If one does something before the other, you automatically think ‘why is my child behind? Are they not meeting their milestones?’”

You’re not always on the same page

“I thought a close friend having a baby at the same time would be great, but the truth is I’m closer to the NCT friends I made,” says Sophie, 33, from Leicester.

“I felt my friend always had exciting responses [from our other friends] about things to do with her pregnancy or baby and then, as my baby was five weeks younger, I never had those same responses. However, with those from NCT that are close in age, it was an amazing experience to share with. 

“My close friend always gave the impression of a perfect baby and never shared the struggles, whereas the NCT group shared anything and everything and that made me feel like I wasn’t alone in my experiences.” 

Names marked * have been changed at the speaker’s request.