Took off my bra and forgot what I was mad about

— Charlene deGuzman (@charstarlene) September 18, 2017

"How many tags should we sew into these? Like, enough to print the Iliad? That sounds good." – Bra designers

— Alison Leiby (@AlisonLeiby) August 25, 2015

Women have come too far for strapless bras to suck so much

— grace spelman: spokeswoman for being bad at math (@GraceSpelman) May 20, 2019

in my next life I want titties small enough to not need a bra

— tracy the business goose (@brokeymcpoverty) February 21, 2020

She was rare, like a bra with underwire that didn’t stab you

— Vision Bored (@VisionBored1) September 14, 2020

I just checked my calendar to see if I can take off my bra for the rest of the day and boy do I have GREAT news

— Ashley C. Ford (@iSmashFizzle) May 17, 2019

Bra: off
Lights: out
Fan: on
Good: night

— currt ♛ (@currtnayy) July 30, 2018

WHY DID WE EVER WEAR BRAS.

I hate this pandemic, but I do like that it made me realize that I have utter contempt for bras

— ⚓️🚢Imani Gandy 🚢⚓️ (@AngryBlackLady) July 14, 2020

When you didn't put on a bra to walk the dog, but some neighbors stopped you to chat about the trash cans. pic.twitter.com/PzVnc0CB4g

— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) November 4, 2018

I’ve never been held hostage, but I have gotten trapped in my own sports bra while getting undressed.

— Rachel Sobel (@whinecheezits) September 28, 2019

Ripping off your mask when you get back in the car is the new taking off your bra when you get home

— Maggie Scott (@maggiescott231) May 10, 2020

5: Mommy, why do girls wear bras?

Me: To support their boobies.

5: No, they’re trapping their boobies. They’re booby traps. *cracks herself up*

I’m raising a comedian.

— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) June 12, 2019

Just told my sister not to die in my shower because the cops would show up and then I'd have to put a bra on.

— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) July 25, 2016

One thing that never works out well is buying a bra in a hurry.

— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) August 27, 2019

i wore a bra for 7 hours today, pls clap

— tracy the business goose (@brokeymcpoverty) September 17, 2020

A trust fall but it’s just me taking off my bra

— Vision Bored (@VisionBored1) September 8, 2020

Ain’t nobody wearing bras bruh https://t.co/jmZvZtoHty

— ⚓️🚢Imani Gandy 🚢⚓️ (@AngryBlackLady) April 12, 2020

I hope as the world slides into vaccine summer everyone’s ready to accept that we will not be going back to bras any time soon. Everyone is going to have to learn to deal with some nips.

— alanna bennett 😩 (@AlannaBennett) March 18, 2021

no one is having a harder time reading the room than all my bra ads on instagram

— Karen Chee (@karencheee) May 17, 2020

I’ve been wearing an underwire bra since I was twelve you can wear a mask

— Jennifer McAuliffe (@JenniferJokes) July 12, 2020

After 5 months of me bra-less-ly watching it, this TV has had enough. pic.twitter.com/sjoI1Mzq1x

— amber ruffin (@ambermruffin) August 4, 2020

Is there such thing as a sports bra that doesn't result in an atrocious uniboob? Asking for a boob of mine.

— Ｍｏｍｚｉｌｌａ (@milliondollrfam) March 20, 2019

I used to think life was a long series of what ifs and general unease, but it turns out I was wearing the wrong size bra.

— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) May 8, 2018

I wonder if Elizabeth Warren has a plan to tackle underboob sweat. Millions of women suffer from underboob sweat. We don't talk about it enough.

I'm thinking a five point plan about constructing a bra that has a freezer pack instead of underwire.

Call me. I've got ideas, Liz.

— ⚓️🚢Imani Gandy 🚢⚓️ (@AngryBlackLady) June 11, 2019

I got 99 problems and most of them boil down to this bra.

— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) December 26, 2020

I think I speak for many cis women when I say that our actual greatest locker-room fear is getting stuck in our sweaty sports bra with no one around to help free us

— andi zeisler (@andizeisler) June 30, 2020

Why can’t the same technology that keeps NFL players’ pants up be used to make a strapless bra

— Erin justice breyer please retire Ryan (@morninggloria) December 21, 2019

wearing a bra is self harm to me….personally.

— queen quen (@quenblackwell) February 18, 2019

In middle school I used to wear a cami under any shirt I wore and now I don’t even where a bra lolol

— Aunt Shi (@Shilah_Richelle) July 20, 2018

I'm sorry I can't respond to your work email. I've taken my bra off for the night.

— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) October 4, 2019

ALL MY NON-BRA-WEARING FRIENDS LOOK AWAY

(whispers) ok whoever's left, is there a technical term for when you have a Bra Incident and you end up with either smashboob or fourboob and you can't fix it right away

is the word i'm looking for calamatitty

— Premee Mohamed (@premeesaurus) May 30, 2018

I saw a woman take her bra off walking down the street today. She appeared fine/not distressed etc. Her dress was loose fitting. She just slam took her bra off in 38 degree weather and put her windbreaker back on and stuffed the bra in her purse. Today…I saw freedom. 😂😂😂😂

— a princess diana stan account (@seabethree) March 8, 2018

I don’t want to brag but I am now the proud owner of two bras that are ok I guess.

— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) October 24, 2020

I hate bras so much now I don’t care if I have 5 mins between zooms I am taking that monster off

— Meena Harris (@meenaharris) March 18, 2021

Me: “Whose bra is that?”
Daughter: “Mine.”
Me: “Why is it on the kitchen windowsill?”
Daughter: “I took it off to eat.”

— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) December 30, 2018

I own a lot of sports bras for someone who doesn’t do any sports.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) January 4, 2021

I quit wearing bras back in January (I switched to bralettes and supportive tank tops) and I know it’s not for everyone but goddamn I’m never going back to the tyranny of cup sizes and underwires

— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) November 7, 2020

Bras are the real oppressors

— ⚓️🚢Imani Gandy 🚢⚓️ (@AngryBlackLady) October 23, 2019

the algorithm only ever shows me bra ads and for a while it was bras that create cleavage then bras for larger cup sizes and now bras for small chests and I want to know what they think is happening to me

— maura quint (@behindyourback) March 9, 2021

not wearing a bra now to avoid that red bra-band mark in your nudes later is called good planning maybe you’ve heard of it

— Vision Bored (@VisionBored1) December 16, 2020

Like many women, I found out I've been wearing the wrong bra fit my whole life. like for instance did you know it's supposed to go on your boobs???

— Megan Amram (@meganamram) April 12, 2018

Bra sizes shouldn’t be measured in numbers and letters but on a scale of how ethereal or matronly you look in a house dress.

— Jenny Jaffe (@jennyjaffe) February 26, 2021

wore a bra today and it actually hurt

— Bolu Babalola (@BeeBabs) March 25, 2020

Putting on and taking off a sports bra counts as exercise. Don’t @ me

— ⚓️🚢Imani Gandy 🚢⚓️ (@AngryBlackLady) October 9, 2019

I need a good, big-titty sports bra that understands it will never have to live up to its name. At most, it'd have to endure an occasional solo dance party. I want something comfortable yet trustworthy, supportive but not oppressive, cute but doesn't try too hard. Please advise.

— Natasha Rothwell (@natasharothwell) June 20, 2020

The only reason I'm wearing a bra is because I need the hug

— Eliza Bayne (@ElizaBayne) April 10, 2020

Doing a jigsaw puzzle is relaxing and fun. Also you don’t need to wear a bra.

— Just J (@junejuly12) January 10, 2021

It should be illegal to switch the meeting from a Zoom to a phone call at the last minute. After I've put on a face and a bra, I'm going to need to be seen, thank you.

— Akilah Green (@akilahgreen) September 2, 2020

An underwire just poked out of the one bra I've been wearing for a year. I feel like this is the Punxsutawney Phil for the pandemic ending soon.

— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) March 30, 2021

I’ve never done PCP, but I have taken off an underwire bra after 11 hours.

— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) September 15, 2018