Wouldn’t it be nice if I wasn’t writing an article? If the world had nothing to say about who someone loves, or how they love them? Sadly, that isn’t the case, and here we are: Phillip Schofield has shown bravery in sharing the news that he is gay, and suddenly everybody has something to say.
The announcement has been met with love, pride and acceptance, but there are an alarming number of comments that are, let’s say, less positive: “I always knew it”, “What about his family?”, “Why is this news?”.
Then there are others that remind us he’s a “Tory”, or those who tell us about his supposed ongoing celebrity feuds. Whether or not these claims are true is besides the point – should these really be reasons not to support his heartfelt announcement? Gay people exist across the world, hold a wide variety of views and are friends with a wide variety of people. Our community is vast and diverse, and rightly so. Sending love to someone who is publicly sharing something personal is not the same as supporting their views, decisions or politics.
To suggest that you “always knew” is troubling – it rests upon assumptions and preconceived notions of what homosexuality is, or how gay people should behave. Stereotypes are not facts, and by attaching behaviours to sexualities we limit how we interact with each other and bolster damaging standards of “masculinity”.
It also belittles individual struggles with sexuality – sadly, even though the world is becoming more open and accepting, it is not always easy to express your true feelings.
Even now, in 2020, it’s uncommon for boys to run around playgrounds kissing other boys or for girls to kiss girls. Imagine what it was like for Schofield, who was in his twenties when Section 28 was introduced – a government act prohibiting the “promotion of homosexuality” in popular culture. But that’s besides the point too because we don’t even know that Schofield fully understood or identified with his sexuality at that time – another assumption that is being thrown around in Twitter’s murky waters.
There is a lot that is not covered in his statement, and rightly so. He has a right to a private life. Sadly, this therefore means that people rush to fill in the gaps. We do not know when or how he began to understand these feelings, therefore it is not fair for us to label his marriage a “sham”, a “lie” or to negate his relationship with his wife and children.
Many comments mask homophobic views with compassion for his family, offering condolences for his “poor wife and kids” despite their explicit acceptance and support. It’s easy to attach personal views to their experience, which can quickly spin into speculation and fake news. Let’s focus on the facts that the family have shared with us.
Schofield has tactfully placed his family at the heart of his statement – acknowledging the “pain and confusion” this is causing, and his interview on This Morning was truly emotional when they discussed his relationship with those closest to him. Though this is clearly an inevitably challenging time, they are facing it together.
I really wish I agreed with those that wish this wasn’t news. I completely empathise with the craving for my sexuality to be normal but currently that is a hope, not a reality. Section 28 was only abolished 17 years ago – it is not yet ancient history. We live in a world where it is still illegal, punishable, to be gay.
And while that is the case, visibility is everything. So yes, I wish I wasn’t writing this article. But I’m glad I am, because the courage required to live authentically in the public eye is something to applaud. As his statement poignantly concludes: “Please be kind”.
Michael Chakraverty is a former Great British Bake Off contestant.