If you’ve ever wondered what a defence secretary does at the weekend – and let’s face it, who hasn’t? – you now have your answer.
They jet off to Norway to swim in icy waters wearing nothing but a hilariously inadequate poncho before warming their cockles with a swift dram.
Well, that’s what Gavin Williamson does at any rate – just look at him…
And here he is necking a short…
Williamson was with British troops in Norway, showing some solidarity as they undergo some intensive winter training which, as if it were needed, is a prime opportunity to relive some of his most Gavin Williamson moments.
That time he scuppered a massive trade deal
Very recently, just this weekend in fact, Williamson was rebuked by the former head of the army for apparently scuppering UK-China trade talks by threatening to deploy a warship to the Pacific.
General Sir Lord Dannatt said Williamson made a “bad diplomatic move” by announcing the HMS Queen Elizabeth would be sent to an area where Beijing has been involved in a territorial dispute in the South China Sea.
Lord Dannatt said Williamson “oversold” his idea, pointing out that the aircraft carrier was not yet even ready for deployment.
That time he told Russia to “shut up”
In the wake of the poisoning of Sergei Skripal last year, temperatures were high and none was higher than that of Williamson as he gave his assessment of UK-Russian relations after the Sailsbury nerve agent attack.
Blaming Russia for the incident, he said: “It is absolutely atrocious and outrageous what Russia did in Salisbury. We have responded to that.
“Frankly, Russia should go away and should shut up.”
The best part of the entire saga was when Good Morning Britain presenter Richard Madeley shut down an interview with him for failing to answer a question five times.
“It would be helpful if you answered a straight question with a straight answer,” Madeley said.
“Do you regret telling Russia to shut up and go away? Mr Williamson, please answer the question.
“You’re not going to answer are you? Alright. Interview terminated. Because you won’t answer the question.”
That time he was heckled by his own mobile phone
Last July Williamson was attempting to deliver a speech on Isis in the Middle East when a voice coming from his jacket pocket interrupted proceedings.
In what the Mirror suggested was probably the first speech to Parliament by an artificial intelligence assistant, Siri could be heard saying: “Hi Gavin, I found something on the web for: “In Syria, democratic forces supported by…”
The speaker of the Commons, John Bercow, then interrupted the unlikely exchange, announcing to the House that this was “a rum business”.
Williamson replied: “I’m not sure what caused that intervention, but I do apologise for that.
“It is very rare that you’re heckled by your own mobile phone, but on this occasion it is a new parliamentary convention, without a doubt.”
That time he raided a ship (sort of)
As we saw in the photos from Norway, Williamson isn’t afraid to get stuck in and last year he watched on as Royal Marines commandos performed a raid on a ship during a visit to HMS Montrose at HMNB Devonport, Plymouth.
No defence secretaries were hurt during the photographing of this raid.